friend group turning against you [all 21F] 6+ years of friendship So I recently lost a friend group that I thought would last a lifetime, I feel extremely stupid and naive for seeing the absolute best in them and going above and beyond for them time and time again. I’m aware there are two sides to every story but here’s what happened from my perspective. I feel like some important disclosures to include is we do recreational & occasionally medicinal drug use from time to time (mostly marijuana, rarely anything else). One night I wanted to take a xanax (I was having a hard time relaxing and just wanted to get a good nights sleep, I’ve only done it a handful of times in my life and I haven’t taken one in months nor intend to ever again, simply not a desire) and the morning after one of my friends texted me a paragraph after I said I was anxious due to running into problems at work and said it was because of the xanax and I need to learn my lesson and how I’m extremely irresponsible and all this unsolicited judgement as if I’ve been a wreck when my life has been extremely together, the most together it’s ever been, I got into a beautiful relationship with a man I’ve been in love with for 6 years, have been making a lot of sales in my business, and overall happy as can be. After that interaction we didn’t talk much, she didn’t respond to me after I communicated with her how that message made me feel but I reached out to her checking up on her and her father (something happened with his health that I won’t get into much) and she responded with better and thanked me for checking up on her. After I continuously hit her up checking on how she was doing, if she needed anything, she wasn’t really writing back. I get a call from the guy she was talking too and he tells me she’s really sick and doesn’t know what to do, I’m giving him advice, telling him what to do, and told them I can come over after my doctors appointment but they reassured me telling me she was feeling better and I had many other errands to run so I went on with my day and was continuously texting both her and her mans to get updates on her state, they just stopped responding to me. Afterwards I secured a job that I’ve been dreaming about for about 5 years now so I had to move and relocate, my boyfriend also for a job in the same area at the same time so we decided to find a place together ❤️. My lease was ending too so it worked out perfected but I was renting out a room in a house where my other friend was living and her dad was the landlord. The girl was suppose to move into the house with us so I texted her trying to update her on my life, I told her about the potential move and how I wanted to let her know because we wanted to live together for a while but we’re adults, this happens, plans change, and she didn’t respond to that message. My boyfriend and I ended up signing a lease together and getting started with the moving process, she called me about two weeks later and asked me since I’m moving in with my boyfriend if we can take in her cat because the landlord doesn’t allow pets, I told her unfortunately no because we’re not ready for pets nor can we afford it but I’ll try to help her find a home for her cat and then we haven’t talked again for another week. She texted me a very formal message along the lines of “hey hope your doing well, can you still help me move into the house, what days work for you?” I told her about 2 months prior to her distancing herself from me and only hitting me up for help that I would help her move since she doesn’t have a car and I just like helping my friends. I was still in the process of moving myself and my birthday was coming up so I told her my body is extremely sore from moving my own furniture and such and how for my bday I really just wanted to relax and asked her if she had anyone else helping her move. She replied with “no but feel better.” And I messaged her about a paragraph calling her out on her actions because I feel like it’s so important to immediately communicate within any sort of relationships if someone is making you feel some type of way and she definitely was making me feel some type of way. I felt so used, uncared for, and like my life/schedule was just irrelevant. She replied saying I showed her multiple actions throughout the past month that made her start distancing herself from me and called me emotionally manipulative (our only communication was me hitting her up to ask how she was doing)? So I stopped talking to her, just stopped replying, didn’t and couldn’t continue communication, it was breaking my heart and giving me severe anxiety. She began talking shit to all our mutual friends, driving them away from me, they all started subtweeting me calling me a fraud, disgusting, fake, etc. (I’ve never had problems with any of them prior) and it was the shittest feeling in the world. I was having anxiety attacks up the ass day in and day out. None of them confronted me directly however so I didn’t know exactly where I stood with them since they were texting me and acting like everything’s fine. I asked one of the girls (whose father is the landlord) if she wanted to have drinks and she told me no because of the way I treated her, talked to her, and our friend. I was extremely confused so I asked her what I did to her and apologized that we felt that way and told her I was simply trying to communicate with our mutual how she was making me feel. No response, three days later, she messages me multiple paragraphs saying how they’re had enough after being my friend for three days, I’ve done multiple things they don’t fuck with(didn’t specify what, I’ve had and extremely positive and beautiful relationship with this girl specifically), and just went off on me for being fake, not taking accountability, acting like I’m never wrong, etc, etc. I cried a lot in confusion, I genuinely loved and cared for these girls so much, did so much for them in the past (not going to list all my positive actions because I think it’s pointless & I know myself and my heart), having my character questioned by these people who have known me so well for so many years hurt so bad. They have been so nice to my face, uplifting, bombarding me with compliments, and then snatching all of it back so quickly and then saying terms they know are extremely triggering to me and saying apparently it’s been three years in the making... like why did they not tell me any of this before I tried calling one of them out on their actions? Am I missing something? I’m always willing to learn and grow from my mistakes and apologize and take accountability for my actions but this time I cannot stand down for some reason, I’m standing my ground because I really have never been more confused. I’m extremely heart broken over this but I’m doing my best to cope and move on and focus on all the positives going on but it’s been hard because I feel like I lost a huge part of them. I also feel bad that I made these girls feel some type of way but they hurt me so much too and just simply aren’t willing to see where I’m coming from. I’m over cliques & I’m over people who are in group chats to talk shit. They hang out with people they talk shit about, and are quickly to turn on people, I’ve witnessed it because they used to talk shit to me. But I guess if someone is gossiping to you, they are definitely gossiping about you. If anyone reads this and takes the time to respond I want to thank you, this has been a very lonely time for me and a very hard experience to process. There is a lot more I can add and little details I can include but I will leave it at this. Much love. tl;dr friend group turned against me and started talking shit after being friends for about 6 years when i called one of them out for only hitting me up when she needed help or favors done for her, called me emotionally manipulative, and turned the rest against me, the others convinced told me I was terrible to them too for a long time and they’ve had enough (I’ve never had any problems with them in the past and they haven’t vocalized anything of this nature to me) heartbroken and looking for a new perspective on the situation and how to move on

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