I left my husband today

I (27F) left my husband (29M) of almost 6 years. I finally realized he is verbally abusive and most likely narcissistic. While I have gotten better about standing up for myself, I am a pretty timid, shy introvert that struggles with communication, and he is an outspoken, very opinionated extrovert.Where do I even begin? When I first met him I thought he was gay. This was purely based on stereotypes, and many of the people I have encountered since the start of our relationship 7 years ago think the same. About 4 years ago I had this weird suspicion that he was hiding something from me. In the middle of the night I checked his phone and found a hookup app where he was asking guys for dick pics. When I confronted him about it, he said that since we weren't having as much sex as he would've liked, I made him feel unattractive so he was reaching out for attention. He said the reason he was asking guys for photos is because it's easier than asking girls. That was the night I lost all trust.A year after the dick pic incident, a piece of trash woman that both my husband and I had met years ago before we had even met each other came back into our lives. My husband apparently had sex with her back when he was 16, and when he brought it up to her, she had no memory of it. He spent the latter part of the evening saying things like "you don't remember? It was in the back of my car!" In front of my face. She continued to come to my house and I noticed a lot of flirtation between the two. He even accidentally called her baby in front of me. Twice I woke up after a night of drinking with him not in bed. The first time I found him on the couch in the living room, and she was on the other couch. The second time they were both asleep in our guest bed. He claims they didn't have sex. His reasoning? He still had clothes on when I found him in there, so there's no way. He was also so drunk that even if he did have sex with her, how could he have been smart enough to put his clothes back on? One time, she showed up unannounced on our anniversary. I went to my bathroom and cried on the floor. When he came and found me, I told him to make her leave and he said he wouldn't. Wow, just typing this makes me realize how much of an idiot I sound like.About a year ago this girl told my best friend that they slept together. Unfortunately, she is such a drunk and homewrecker that I'm not even sure if she would've even remembered the sex if it actually happened, so she's not a credible source.Around that same time he picked up a job where he did networking events. A lot of them were at night and held at restaurants and bars. One night he just never came home and he never texted or called me. I contacted my mother in law first thing the next morning and she immediately started checking county jails and hospitals. Around 10 am while I was at work he finally contacted me and said his phone died, he got really drunk and ended up sleeping at a guy's house he met that night. He made it seem like it was not a big deal.During this time, I was extremely paranoid for obvious reasons. I was constantly checking Verizon to see who he was texting. I started noticing him texting the same number constantly, and when I googled, it was an out of state number attached to a gym I'd never heard of. One night he was coming home from work and he said his phone was dying and that we should stop texting (maybe because he was using a GPS?) Several minutes later I checked his text history online and he was still texting this number after he told me his phone was about to die. Fucking heartbreaking. I never dared mention this to him because he would accuse me of snooping or lying or whatever.Lots of crazy things between then and now (including odd text messages and inappropriate back massages while laying on a sofa - both with guys) but I recently found out from a good friend that my husband does coke - and has been doing it for years. He told me that my husband mentioned to him one time that I found a baggy in the dryer and then laughed about it because I had no idea it was once filled with cocaine. I wasn't ready to confront him about it yet until one night when he left our house around 4 am. Our security camera cut off, and when it cut back on his car was gone. An hour and a half later the camera cuts off again and when it comes back on, his car is back. I noticed this disappearing act the next morning and my first thought was that he was going out and doing coke. He told me he went to a gas station and ate a fig newton and drank a soda in his car because I bitch at him so much about spending money. I didnt believe him.My friend who alerted me about my husband's coke usage told me that two of our male acquaintances told my friend at two separate occasions that my husband had first given them coke, then asked to suck their dicks, or offered to masturbate in front of them. When I confronted my husband about this, he acted surprised and wanted to reach out to these two guys and find out exactly what was said. He says this never happened and he acted extremely surprised and concerned. Of course, he never reached out to them.I decided to look through his emails on his computer the day after the fig newton incident and noticed under the folder "important" he had requested access to his keepsafe photo vault the night before. I decided to download the app and use the access code emailed to him and BAM - pictures of his penis everywhere. One picture was of him naked in front of the bathroom mirror, holding his dick, and sucking a dildo attached to the wall. I was horrified. The pictures were from about 2 years ago and he says he didn't send them to anyone, but I just don't believe him.Another shot at therapy and it came out that he had been struggling with his sexuality and that I was the only who made him question whether or not he was gay. So he experimented and felt "embarrassed and disgusted" at his actions. Except, why keep them in your photo stash two years later if that is the case? The therapist asked if he is gay or bi and he said no. Again, I don't believe him. I admitted in therapy that while it would be an adjustment and a shock, I would not leave him if he were to come out as bi, but that we had originally agreed on a closed relationship and therefore I would leave him if he was acting on his fantasies.My husband talked down to me a LOT. He's one of those assholes that gives you the biggest look of disgust and the most dramatic eye roll when you haven't heard of something before. Like... "Wow... You didn't know that?" *Eye roll, look of disgust." He also gets super angry when we are in a fight, which causes me to shut down and not respond. I also start crying which he absolutely HATES. His reasoning is: why cry when we can just fix it? I've never apologized to someone so much for my tears.I decided enough is enough. I left. Though he's never hit me, he threatened to burn down the house, murder-suicide, etc. I quickly took one of my dogs to my mom's house. When I returned to the house to get more of my things, he had already taken my work laptop and let the air out of one of my tires. He told me to return our dog or he would damage my laptop. Since I knew he was somehow going to get my dog anyway, I gave in. He guilt tripped me and said "it really shows how you care more about your work stuff than our dog." I'm currently staying at my mom's, and his texts are absolutely insane. From anger to desperation to love and kindness and back to anger. He keeps blaming me for leaving him with all the home responsibilities (e.g. our pets, the laundry, no groceries for him... I lol-ed at the last one.) I keep wanting to go back to the house and just take care of everything so I don't feel shamed for "abandoning" everything, but I know he's just trying to reel me in. He's currently piling all of our Christmas stuff in our driveway and threatening to throw it all away. Of course, it's all on our security camera so I get to watch it happen. Yay.While I am lucky to not have any children with him, we do own a house as well as a business. Our business is his primary "job" although it is at the very start and we have not made enough money to even pay him, so he works a side gig making a whopping $600 a month. I make the money in the house so I wouldn't even know how to split it with him or if I should just take the money and run. I'm terrified he will take all the money out of our account and I won't have enough to pay the mortgage. I have an appointment with my therapist next Wednesday but I just don't know what to do until then besides ignoring his texts and not giving in to his manipulation. https://www.reddit.com/r/abusiverelationships/comments/eiag62/i_left_my_husband_today/?utm_source=ifttt